Remembering the Grandmother I Loved and Admired

 

In the past two years of the COVID-19 pandemic, loss has been part of the lives of millions. In “How we remember them”, we reflect on how we process that loss and the things – both tangible and intangible – that remind us of those we have lost.

I learned of grief in 1984 when my grandmother, Sama Kaur, died. I was 30 years old and working in AICRP Project of ICAR, in CCSHAU,HISAR,HARYANA as Research Associate at the time.

My grand ma had to work a lot and there was just no opportunity for women to stay home and take care of their children, she had to take care of cattles (collect their dung, make cow dung cakes clean cattle shed)she had to fetch water from well, churn milk, after household and animal husbandry tasks she had to go to farm for rest of the day and return home at dusk . Just like grand ma, I spent my childhood, all school breaks in a remote village with no electricity, TV or other advantages of civilization. I am not regretting it, it was a very happy childhood. We were always outside, playing, reading, helping in the nohara (A semi-covered area with some boundary for keeping the livestockavar ) and our farm   the whole day. We didn’t have electricity, reading good books with the kerosene lantern  light, no refrigerator, storing the food underground, no washing machine, walking miles on sandy path  and washing the clothes in the pond water, no market in the village , picking up our fresh veggies like guavar fali, channa saag, saangari, kaachri, kaachar,petha,ghiya,tindsi from our farm and bitoda area  (A triangular, open storage for dung-cakes ('Gossey' गोस्से )and getting the water from the well (it was my favorite activity ever!!!).

My  Gandma was a very important person in my life, a hardworking and loving woman. And she left such an important impact on my life. Gandma left Bagar(The areas adjoining Bikaner and to the west of Bhiwani, such as Hissar and Fatehabad were called Bagar, a term meaning 'dry country' in common parlance. The term 'Bagri' was applied to a Hindu Rajput or Jat from the Bagar region.) , her birth place after her marriage when she was 12  years of age and now lives  in Bhiwani District of Haryana.   One year she went  to spend her vacation with her parents who live in her grandparent’s house  and she found there a bag full of yarn that was hand-spun by my grandma’s  grandma  many  years ago. She brought that yarn with her when returned to her own house It was so inspiring and emotional to see this yarn and it was a beginning of a wonderful journey of creating something absolutely unique – raw minimally processed traditional Haryanvi  desi cotton. And this is how my love for hand spun raw cotton yarn developed. And I learned all the spinning related tasks including preparing charkha to spun.

TODAY ON HER DEATH ANNIVERSARY , I REMEMBERED MY GRANDMOTHER IN THIS WAY AND FELT SO GOOD!!!

TODAY IS ALSO THE FIRST SHRADH

GOOD BY GRANDMAAA!

Holy Bhagwad Geeta, My grandmaa's ancient backless blouse

न बुद्धिभेदं जनयेदज्ञानां कर्मसङ्गिनाम् |

जोषयेत्सर्वकर्माणि विद्वान्युक्त: समाचरन् || 26||

BG 3.26: The wise should not create discord in the intellects of ignorant people, who are attached to fruitive actions, by inducing them to stop work. Rather, by performing their duties in an enlightened manner, they should inspire the ignorant also to do their prescribed duties.

When visiting my Dadi’s/ grand maa  room in our mansion and browsing around her wonderful attic filled with treasures I found this AAngi . I spotted it from a distance, thrown over an old pidhaa  for dolls. And I saved it from spending more years in neglect ion, explaining firmly that THIS is a real treasure. THIS is a heirloom. THIS is art. THIS is beautiful. And HOW can this fantastic Dadi’s wear just be thrown up in a dusty attic and not be loved, cherished and looked at every day? THIS was made by my Granny Shamaakaur  some decades ago - it is a piece of history. In perfect condition. Made from cotton fabric, carefully weaved in ends, no holes, no ends showing ANYWHERE. Simple and beautiful. Very classic and Haryanvi in the color theme. 

After going on about this for about 10 minutes, my daughter  promised 

back less blouse knoted with strings on both sides of blouse ..no buttons

close up of front bow this is hand woven and hand spun yarn fabric sewen by hand only 

to take care of it.  Carefully wash it, air dry it and put it to use as a deco piece on a board. To look at it and love it. Every day forever. I saved it. I saved one of My Dadi’s hand work and needle work, embroidery work  on aangi. 

 I will try this out for sure, let see when will i sew its deto copy. 

xoxo

holy Bhagwad-Geeta,

त्रैगुण्यविषया वेदा निस्त्रैगुण्यो भवार्जुन |
निर्द्वन्द्वो नित्यसत्वस्थो निर्योगक्षेम आत्मवान् || 45||
 BG 2.45: The Vedas deal with the three modes of material nature, O Arjun. Rise above the three modes to a state of pure spiritual consciousness. Freeing yourself from dualities, eternally fixed in truth, and without concern for material gain and safety, be situated in the self.

Protein Fibers

I still  remember my grandma's spinning wheel she used to spin sheep wool on charkha (Indian spinning wheel) it was very difficult to spin that wool. 

The darling of the knitting world is wool. But wool is only one of many protein fibers. These are fibers that come from animals, and in the case of silk, insects. They all contain carbon, hydrogen, oxygen, nitrogen, and sulfur. And since they are almost all made of hair, theoretically your hair could be spun into fiber as well.

xoxo